Perspective

Every now and then I stumble across something that puts my life and my accomplishments into proper perspective. For example, a few nights ago, my wife called me into our bedroom to kill a spider. You can bet your ass I showed that arachnid who was boss. I crushed it like the insignificant little spec that it was, then headed back out to the living room secure in my manhood and looking for a celebratory Smirnoff Ice.

Ice in hand, I hopped online and was greeted, rather harshly by the following story which put not only my bug squashing in perspective, but my drinking ability as well. This guy is a fucking man's man. I am something else. Perhaps a gay man's man. Or preferrably a young girl's man. I may have killed the spider, but I didn't even eat it.

Either way, the sting began to dissipate as I curled up next to our dog with my fantasy baseball magazine, looked over at the three empty Smirnoff Ice bottles and marveled at the gentle buzz I was feeling.

Hunter - gatherer, I apparently am not.